Along with a lot of wisdom, Donna Ramsbottom shared stories with us about the sense of joy and purpose raising children has given her, and how motherhood has helped her reconnect with her cultural background. Let’s get to know her.   How has your relationship with your daughters changed over the years? It has become more of a friendship. I love that they call me Donna and not Mom. There came a point in my life where my parent-years turned off and I wouldn't answer when they were calling me Mom. So they just started calling me Donna. It works. I really appreciate that my daughters listen to me, and I've learned to listen to them. They've taught me a lot, especially how to be carefree. To just live and not worry. Do you have any favourite stories about your kids? Doran was a competitive swimmer. She swam on the national team. When she was a baby and I was swimming laps in the pool, her dad was walking her along the edge of the pool, and she let go of his hand and jumped in the water. Her dad tapped me on the head and said, “You better go get your daughter.” I found her sitting at the very bottom of the pool, the deep end, like a little Buddha looking up at me. She was holding her breath and everything. She was only about a year old when that happened. So from then on, I made sure she knew how to float. How did your life change when you became a mother? It brought me so much joy and purpose. I just had so much fun. I got to be a little girl again, and I got to teach them everything I felt I missed out on. It's the best thing in the world. Motherhood brings out the best and teaches you so many things.    It's the best thing in the world. Motherhood brings out the best and teaches you so many things. Earlier you mentioned you didn’t learn much about your cultural background when you were growing up. How did you teach your children about their heritage?  My dad was part Native and, growing up, I was told not to tell anybody that. So most of my life I've had to keep everything hidden. When I had my daughters, I wanted them to know all the stories that my dad had told. I wanted them to know he was part Native and that he taught me how to hunt, trap, and track. He taught me how to live off the land in the wild—what fruits to boil and what berries to pick. And also how to use herbs to get rid of poison ivy and things like that. So when my children were little, I started taking them to the beach or for walks in the bush to show them things in the wild.  One day when we were up north, I showed them rabbit tracks in the snow, and my baby—who was only about three or four—was standing on top of the snow and she started following the rabbit tracks into the forest and I had to go and catch her, but I sunk up to my waist in the snow while she was just walking on top of the drifts. It was pretty fun. Doran was always worrying that Charlotte was going to get lost in the bush. Why was it important to you to share that cultural history with your daughters? I had felt so much shame back then, and I'm going to cry right now because I felt like I wasn't part of my friends or part of the world. Now I'm so proud that I can say I have a little bit of Indigenous love in me, and I’m very grateful for the community it has brought. I'm learning things. I go to powwows now and that has been such an amazing, peaceful, wholesome fulfilling experience.   Now I'm so proud that I can say I have a little bit of Indigenous love in me, and I’m very grateful for the community it has brought.  We thought it would be fun to get to know Donna even further by interviewing her daughter, Doran Reed. What we discovered was a pretty special relationship based on life advice, fashion advice, singing in the car, and hiking through the woods. Let’s get to know her.    Can you tell us something you love about your mother? I love her resilience. She’s had a lot of obstacles in her lifetime, and she’s shown me time and time again how to get over those obstacles. She’s never faltered. She’s never shown that the path is too difficult. She's always there, pulling herself back up and getting where she needs to go.   I love her resilience. She's always there, pulling herself back up and getting where she needs to go. How would you describe your relationship with your mother? I call her whenever I'm going to work. I call her whenever I need anything. She's my go-to. She's my mom. Like I'll send her an outfit photo and be like, “Does this look good?” It's really easy for me to go to her for any sort of advice. She always has the right answer for me. What are three words that describe your mother? Loving, thoughtful, incredibly-hardworking-slash-determined. I'm going to squeeze that in as a double whammy.  What's the best advice your mom has given you? “You can be anything that you want to be because you are you.” Do you want to give her an early Happy Mother’s Day message?  I love you, Mama. Happy Mother's Day. I'm so glad I get to do life with you. Thank you for being my mom.   I'm so glad I get to do life with you. Thank you for being my mom. Do you have a favourite memory with your mom?  Every time we go on a big walk together. That's kind of like our hobby, especially since we moved here. We used to do big walks on the beach, but now we have the whole forest to explore and our dogs love to run together. So whether we're happy or sad, it's hike time. Let's go. We put on the boots and go as far north as we possibly can. Rain, shine, snow, sleet, we're out there in the bush, reconnecting with nature and one another. It's a really good time. We've cried, we've laughed, we've sung. We go through the whole Justin Timberlake bringing sexy back album and scream at the top of our lungs in the car together.  So it's just the feeling you get when you're with each other and it’s just love encapsulated in the moment.  By: Carter Selinger

Becky De Oliveira is the owner of Blush and Bloom—a thriving flower and wedding studio in Toronto. We spoke to her about mom guilt, striking a balance between a busy work and home life, and the importance of taking time to nurture kindness and curiosity in her daughter Florence.    Can you tell us about your postpartum journey? I didn’t realize the level of postpartum care that I would need, so going back to work early hit me like a ton of bricks. As a business owner, I knew there would be a dramatic change, but I didn’t know exactly what that would be. I wasn’t equipped community-wise and support-wise to handle everything. That made things a little bit more challenging for someone who was used to coming and going as they pleased and working as much as needed.  Have you surprised yourself with how you’ve managed to continue to successfully run your business and raise your daughter? I think I surprised myself with my ability to realize that I needed to lean on the people I do have. They are willing and capable to help with a lot of the business side of things. Realizing that I have a team who are invested in my brand and invested in my success in business as well as being a mom was very important.  It's really hard and a lot of work, but I'm very proud. We were thrilled when we found out we were becoming parents. But I never fully understood how motherhood affects the trajectory of things with business and life in general. I think we just didn't know what it all looked like for us. It's a wild thing in a demanding world. You’re used to giving a thousand percent of everything to your work. And now it's kind of like, okay, well, there are more important things. I really don't think I would have come to that realization if I didn’t have a baby.    You’re used to giving a thousand percent of everything to your work. And now it's kind of like, okay, well, there are more important things. What do you love most about Florence? She knows what she wants. She knows what she likes and doesn't like, and she’s very kind. That’s something that we talk about a lot in our home, kindness. She really loves nature. She's just a very kind, helpful little girl.  What advice would you give to future mothers who are entrepreneurs?  To make sure they build their community and to not be afraid to accept help from their family or friends—even before the baby comes. Normalize the idea of asking for help, even if it's something small like: “Can you come over and talk to me during nap time so that I can have an adult conversation and make my life feel somewhat normal for a second?”    Normalize the idea of asking for help, even if it's something small like: ‘Can you come over and talk to me during nap time so that I can have an adult conversation and make my life feel somewhat normal for a second? If you're an employer, you want to keep making sure your team is doing a great job and feeling good because they’re such a valuable support system. You’re going to need to be able to relinquish some control in your life whether that’s with your business or with mom stuff.  Do you ever tire of questions about what it’s like to balance being an entrepreneur and raising a child? It seems like moms would get asked that way more than dads.   I do feel like it's harder in every way for female entrepreneurs as parents. Moms are often the primary caregivers, so adding the mental load of motherhood to entrepreneurship, it’s a lot. It's tough to feel like you’re thriving in all of those areas and to be constantly asked “How do you do it?” When you know that dads are probably not being asked the same questions.    I do feel like it's harder in every way for female entrepreneurs as parents. Moms are often the primary caregivers, so adding the mental load of motherhood to entrepreneurship, it’s a lot. Can you tell us a bit about your business?  It’s called Blush and Bloom. We are a flower and wedding studio here in Toronto. I’ve been an owner of the business for 12 years now. And we've expanded to include a sister brand in floral education called Blue School. Flowers are all I know. So it just feels natural that this is what I'm doing and what I've always been doing.  We do anywhere from 30 to 60 corporate events and weddings per year. On top of that we have the education and workshop aspects of the business, which are fully separate. So yeah, we're hopping most of the time. Do you ever feel mom guilt?  Yeah. 100%. My gosh. I work on weekends so I feel all-consuming mom guilt sometimes. Work definitely takes away from a lot of typical family time like summers at the park, or traveling. I'm learning to prioritize, take a step back from the business, and take a month off with my family to make sure we have time to make memories. It took me five years to be able to do that though. But yeah, the guilt is still there. It’s almost like FOMO. But even if we can just go to the park or something, I love that. Florence gets to do all these really fun things with her dad during their time. So that's also really special. But it’s very hard because her dad gets evenings and weekends off and I’m working during that time, and I’m the owner. I make all the decisions so sometimes I need to answer my phone or be there for my team. But, yeah, mom guilt is real.     I work on weekends so I feel all-consuming mom guilt sometimes. What do you tell yourself in moments when you’re feeling guilty?  I don't know if there's anything I tell myself, but it has gotten easier to deal with now that I’ve made sure I'm compensating in other ways. I've set a lot of boundaries to prioritize family. So now I'll tell myself, “You're leaving at five in the morning and missing out on taking Florence to her friend’s birthday party, but you’re going to be home to have dinner.” I also actively try to remind myself that this business might be around long enough that one day I can say to Florence: “Well, do you want this? If this is what you want to do, here you go.”  What are some of the positive, joyful things that have come out of motherhood?  I think I listen more and take more time to focus on slowing down. I try to see things through my child's eyes like flowers, nature, or cities. That’s really interesting. You have blinders on sometimes because you don't have time to focus on random stuff when you're busy. Kids can help you pay attention to the things that are new and important to them that maybe you haven’t thought about in a while.  It's endearing to hear some of the questions they ask and how pure things can be at this age. That’s why it’s nice to take the time to give their questions a really good answer. That curiosity is so fun to watch. It’s really exciting. Yeah, I just love her.    Kids can help you pay attention to the things that are new and important to them that maybe you haven’t thought about in a while. By: Carter Selinger

We spoke with Lesley Billingsley about raising her two children, Savannah and Luther, as a stay-at-home mom. Lesley chatted to us about the challenges, discoveries, and joys of motherhood. She also shared a few of the unlikely lessons her children have taught her along the way. Let’s get to know her.   What do you love most about your children? It’s something different for each of them. Savannah is so caring and compassionate. She's always making sure everyone's okay. She's really sensitive and emotional. I love that about her.  Luther is a ball of energy. He is, as my cousin likes to say, real-life funny. He's not little-kid funny. He's funny across the board. He keeps us laughing. I was trying to figure out our love languages one day. Like Savannah's is definitely physical touch. I think mine is acts of service. I was trying to think of what Luther's was and he just announced: “I know what mine is. Mine is tuna.”  What have you discovered about yourself since becoming a mother? I've discovered that every day can be a new day. So whether you have a great adventure with your children or if you make a mistake, you start over. You wake up in the morning, you leave yesterday behind you, and you just start fresh and try to do the best you can for yourself and your children.    You wake up in the morning, you leave yesterday behind you, and you just start fresh and try to do the best you can for yourself and your children. What have your children taught you? I think Savannah taught me that you don't have to be perfect. You can make mistakes and you can try again. I liked things done a certain way before kids, but now I'm more flexible and lenient. Luther taught me that there's no exact timing for everything, and everything is worth the wait. When Luther was 18 months old, he wasn’t talking. We had to go into speech therapy. We were really worried. But now he’s saying his love language is tuna. So I guess when the time is right, the time is right.    I think Savannah taught me that you don't have to be perfect. You can make mistakes and you can try again. Luther taught me that there's no exact timing for everything, and everything is worth the wait. What's the most challenging part of motherhood? Not really knowing what to do. There's no textbook. Even if you talk to all the mothers in the world, it will never fully prepare you. So I think the most challenging part is not having a way to quantify if what you're doing is right or wrong. And you really won't know how you’ve done until way down the road when your kids grow up. Have you ever faced any judgment or adversity as a stay-at-home mom? I’ve realized I'm very privileged to be in a position where my partner can go to work and provide for us while I’m at home taking care of the children. Some people I meet say they wish they could be in my position so they could’ve had more time with their kids. And then other people kind of turn up their noses at me. I get comments like: “When are you going to get a real job?” “What do you do all day?” “When are you going back to work?” I'm always like, “I am working. It's just a different form of work.” Motherhood is 24/7 and you don't get paid.  Those kinds of questions come from well-intentioned people like friends and family, too. They're not trying to judge me at all. They’re just like “Hey, you used to have this job. Are you ever going to go back to it?” They’re just curious. But sometimes it can hurt a little bit. I've been a stay-at-home parent since Savannah was born eight years ago. When she went to kindergarten, I went back to work for a few months, but basically, I've been home with the kids 24/7 for eight years. In September Luther’s starting kindergarten so I'm going to be entering a brand new phase of my motherhood journey. It's scary, it's exciting, it’s unknown. I don't know what it's going to look like for me. My priority is getting Luther thriving and doing his thing in kindergarten, and then I'll see what things look like for me.   Luther’s starting kindergarten so I'm going to be entering a brand new phase of my motherhood journey. It's scary, it's exciting, it’s unknown. Do you have any advice for new moms? Just soak it up. You can get all the baby cuddles. I remember when both the kids were really small, people would say, “You're always picking them up. They're not going to know how to use their legs.” But I just wanted to get in as much time with them as possible because I knew how quickly they go through those phases. My advice to new moms is to just enjoy those moments without feeling guilty.    My advice to new moms is to just enjoy those moments without feeling guilty. By: Carter Selinger

Natalie Spooner knows how to pump herself up. Whether it's telling herself she’s unstoppable or pumping breast milk for her baby in between periods of a professional hockey game, there doesn’t seem to be anything that can slow her down. It’s that kind of energy that makes her such a force on and off the ice and an integral part of helping get the PWHL to where it is now. Let’s get to know her.        Has hockey helped you affirm or realize any aspects of your identity or personality? I started playing hockey at four years old so it's always been a part of my life, and it’s taught me a lot about hard work, perseverance, and dedication. I don't think I would be the person I am without this sport. A lot of my personality has probably come from the energy I get from the teammates I’ve always been surrounded by. The best thing about being on a team is how much fun you have with your teammates. I think that has played a big role in shaping who I am.   I started playing hockey at four years old so it's always been a part of my life, and it’s taught me a lot about hard work, perseverance, and dedication. Why do you think it's important for women and girls to stay in sports? Teamwork, dedication, hard work, and time management—there are so many skills you learn through sports that I think everyone uses in their daily lives. It's so important for girls to have those experiences. For me, sports were always a great release. I’ve always felt free on the ice and just had so much fun playing. There's a lot of stress in the world, so why not go out, play a game, and have a lot of fun? Do you have any advice for young girls that are playing sports?  Believe in yourself. I think that that's the main thing. If I could go back, I would tell my little self to believe in myself and to know that you can achieve your dreams.  The other thing is that sports should be about having fun. I still remind myself every day to go back to thinking like that little girl who had so much fun playing hockey. That's what it's all about. So as long as you love what you're doing and having fun, it doesn’t feel like work. It's just fun. What do you think the development of the PWHL means for young women and hockey in general?  It means a lot. Not only are we able to have a career playing hockey, but all of those little girls who watch us get to have the dream of playing professional women's hockey, just like any little boy would have.  Is there anything that you wish non-athletes realized about professional women's hockey? I wish people knew more about all the amazing ladies that I get to play with and against. Before we had this professional league, there were ladies from all different walks of life: teachers, chiropractors, firefighters, police officers. Some women had full-time jobs and they would come and play hockey at night and be on the road all weekend.  This is the first year we’ve had a professional women's hockey league and we're able to make it into a career and have a salary. A lot of the ladies don't have to have side jobs or other careers now, and I think that’s amazing. It's going to help take women's hockey to the next level because everyone can focus on hockey and not have to worry about where their next paycheck is coming from.   This is the first year we’ve had a professional women's hockey league and we're able to make it into a career and have a salary. What was your involvement in getting the PWHL started? So in 2019, the CWL folded and we decided to come together, all the female hockey players, to create the PWHPA Players Association, and we ended up going on a Dream Gap tour. We played all across North America in all different rinks, and it was a great way to show there was a market for women's hockey.   From there we were lucky enough to get icons like Billie Jean King behind us. She’s one of the main people giving money. I don't think we could have gotten to where we are now without people like Billie Jean, Stan Kasten of the LA Dodgers, and Dana Halford. All of them really believed in the vision and we're just so lucky for their support. What it was like to become a mother as a professional athlete? It takes quite a bit of planning to start a family and then come back to sport. I had to time my pregnancy. So after the 2022 Beijing Olympics, we wanted to start a family, but I had set a goal I wanted to be back playing in the next world championships. Luckily, I got pregnant right away, and it all kind of went smoothly and I was able to achieve that goal. But it also meant that while I was playing hockey, I was still breastfeeding. So you were playing at this high level while you were still breastfeeding? Can you tell us about that? It was definitely a challenge. The time commitment that breastfeeding takes was one of the things that surprised me most about being a mom. I was able to bring him with me to most of the places I went because my mom would come along, too. But being away from him for games and practices, I had to get really good at being able to pump in the locker room or between periods. I had some pretty discrete pumps that I could just slip on in the locker room with the girls. I thought it was super funny when my teammates would look over and I’d be there pumping, and then either sending milk up or putting it in the fridge for after the game. When you're a high-performance athlete, you're trying to power through and so forth. Maintaining your milk and making sure you're drinking enough and eating enough was a struggle. During the world championships, we were in some pretty intense games. So that was hard, but I was able to make it through.    Being away from [my son] for games and practices, I had to get really good at being able to pump in the locker room or between periods. You were back playing hockey four months after you gave birth. What are some of the things that you didn't anticipate would impact your career as a professional athlete? I came back four months postpartum to play my first hockey game in the PWHPA to give myself a chance to get ready for the World Championships, which were around the five-month mark. There were so many unknowns going into pregnancy and training afterwards. I don't think I realized how much my body changed because it happened so slowly.   I came back four months postpartum to play my first hockey game in the PWHPA to give myself a chance to get ready for the World Championships. You kept skating until you were 36 weeks pregnant—what was that like? I just loved getting out on the ice and I think the rink was where I felt the most normal, before and after giving birth. It felt like some type of normalcy to go out there and get back to being with my teammates. Life as a new mom can be quite isolating, so to have my teammates around me again was really freeing and so much fun. It made me feel like myself again. How did you deal with the hunger, exhaustion, and sleep deprivation that pregnancy can cause?  So I found when I was breastfeeding, I was definitely eating way more every time I woke up in the night to feed. I also drank excessive amounts of water. Even when I was pregnant, I was so thirsty. I don't think I've felt that type of thirst before, but I just had to make sure I was eating whenever I was hungry and fueling my body. Is there anything else you want to share about your experience becoming a mom and having a career as a professional athlete? Were there any emotional impacts or unexpected challenges? When I became a mom, I did feel my priorities shift. Before, my whole life was built around hockey. And I would say I was a very selfish person in a sense. I was so committed to my training and that was really all that mattered. And then I had this baby that needed me and that I had to care for. When I would have to go away for games and bring him with me, my mom would come, but I still felt this sense of guilt when I was leaving him to go on the ice. At the same time, I knew this was what I needed.  So there was some learning to do there and some new balances to find between my love for hockey and my love for my baby. My baby takes priority, but I was able to find a pretty good balance between being a mom and coming back to play the sport I love. If you’re having a challenging time or need a confidence boost or something like that, are there any things you say to yourself? I tell myself to be unstoppable, and I just picture myself being so dominant. I literally just tell myself “Be unstoppable.”  We noticed you like to play in your Sparkle Balls™ and other H&B jewelry. Why do you find yourself drawn to it?  I remember when I got my first pair of Sparkle Balls™, I just loved the way I felt in them. It’s the same way now with my pearl Sparkle Balls™—I just feel really good whenever I wear them. They're my go-to's, and I have to wear the biggest ones.   I remember when I got my first pair of Sparkle Balls™️, I just loved the way I felt in them. Do you have any advice for women in general?  My advice for women would be to chase your dreams. No matter what. I can't say it's going to be easy. It's probably going to be difficult and there's going to be lots of twists and turns. But in the end, it's definitely worth it. You'll remember the journey more than the destination.    Chase your dreams. No matter what. By: Carter Selinger

For Skylar Park, family is a big part of success. Her father is her coach, her brothers are competing to get into the Olympics, and in total 16 members of her family have black belts in taekwondo. Her family’s generational commitments to the sport are part of what has made Skylar’s achievements in taekwondo so special. We chatted with the 2023 Pan American Games champion about the upcoming Paris Olympics, mentoring young athletes, gender equality in taekwondo, and what it’s like to get your period right before a gold medal match. Let’s get to know her.        Are there any moments you've experienced while competing that have felt especially significant to you? Things that you look back on as either lessons or turning points? There have been so many. There have been times when I've won that boosted my confidence. I've also had some really big losses that have taught me so much and allowed me to come back even stronger. In 2016 I won the Junior World Championships on home soil. My whole family was in the crowd. It was super special. It was the first time that I competed on the world stage and I was just so excited to show the world what I could do. I'd been doing taekwondo since I could walk, mainly with my family. My dad's my coach, and I train with my brothers and cousins. So I felt like I was just coming out of nowhere and trying to shock everyone and see what I could do. That was a very special feeling.  Another big turning point in my career was the Tokyo Olympics. For as long as I can remember, I’ve dreamed of going to the Olympics and winning a gold medal for Canada. I was so excited for my first Olympic Games, but I didn't end up performing as well as I wanted to. There was a lot of heartbreak that went along with that. But the lessons I learned through that experience have allowed me to become very successful leading up to the Paris Olympics. So it's been really exciting. Can you tell us a little bit about what you're most excited about for the upcoming Olympics? Yeah, I have now officially qualified for the Paris Olympics. I think I'm just excited to be back in the Olympics in such a special place. It’s something that I've dreamed of for so long. I did it in Tokyo, but it wasn't quite a normal Olympics per se. There were no fans and my family couldn't be there. I know I've worked hard since Tokyo, and so to be in Paris as a stronger athlete, a more confident athlete, and to have my whole family there will be really exciting. Has sport helped you affirm or realize any aspects of your personality or identity? Taekwondo is a sport but also a martial art, and I think there are so many aspects of confidence, discipline, and respect grounded in its principles. As a woman, I’ve been able to gain so much confidence through a combat sport. You learn how to defend yourself.   Sport is such a powerful tool, especially for young people. There’s the determination you get, the ability to work hard, to work with others. There are so many things that sport brings to us as athletes and as people, and I think that's why I love taekwondo so much. When I was young I was very shy. At taekwondo schools there would always be an awards banquet and a dance afterwards. Everyone would always be dancing and trying to get me to dance but I was too shy. But then, when I was seven years old, the night that I achieved my black belt at this awards banquet, I was on the dance floor all night and they basically haven't been able to get me off the dance floor since then.   As a woman, I’ve been able to gain so much confidence through a combat sport. You learn how to defend yourself. Why do you think it's important for women and girls to stay in sports? I'm very passionate about young girls staying in sports. Sport has given me so much in my life.  I now have the ability and the honour to coach young girls in taekwondo. On a daily basis, I see what sport brings them—how much confidence it gives them, and how many tools they learn from it and bring into their everyday lives. Seeing that transformation in them, the same transformation that I went through as a young girl, is really special.   I'm very passionate about young girls staying in sports. On a daily basis, I see what sport brings them—how much confidence it gives them, and how many tools they learn from it and bring into their everyday lives. Can you share a bit more about your experience mentoring young women in taekwondo?  Yeah, I think it's been an honour for me to have the opportunity to coach so many young girls and young women, in the sport that I love. I'm 24, and so having that experience of having gone to an Olympic Games and competed internationally for a long time, there are so many lessons that I can teach them. One of the biggest things is just showing them the confidence they have within and teaching them how to bring it out and carry it into everything they do in their lives.  It’s also important to remind them that not everything is as perfect as it seems and things don't go smoothly all the time. I think as young athletes or as young people, we think that the road to success is always a straight line and everything's going to go according to plan perfectly. But they need to understand that things don't always go your way. Sharing some of the setbacks that I’ve had with these young women, how I've overcome them, and how they've made me stronger in the end is very beneficial. And hopefully, I'm helping them get through their hard times and come out stronger. What's it like competing at a high level when you're dealing with everyday things like getting your period? Getting your period while competing is something that isn't talked about enough at all. I competed at the Grand Prix in Taiwan in September of last year and it was my first time winning a Grand Prix, so it was super exciting. But in between the semifinal and final match, I got my period. My stomach was cramping so bad. And I think on the broadcast, even here, when I go back in between the rounds to talk to my dad, I'm like, “My stomach hurts so bad.” I'm trying to tell him and he's like, “You’re fine, you’re fine. Like, you can do it.” I ended up finishing the match and winning the semifinal. And so I had to go up right away again to compete in the final. So they wanted to keep me in the holding area downstairs. But I was like, no, like I have to go upstairs to see my doctor. And so they finally let me through and I went with my doctor. And so she had me lying on the ground. I think I had like 5 minutes. And so I was lying on the ground while she had my feet up in the air and was putting ice straight on my stomach. So I was freezing. Then she gave me Tylenol or something to help with the pain. And then she was like massaging, pushing on my stomach. I don't know what she was doing, but it was chaotic and she kept telling me to eat crackers. So, we had 5 minutes to figure it out. And then they called me up, and I had to be ready to fight. I was in so much pain, which, to be honest, might have helped a little bit because I wasn't even thinking about being in the final of the Grand Prix. But as soon as I stepped on the mat, I was able to kind of fight through the pain of my cramps. I think that’s something a lot of female athletes go through, and it isn’t talked about a lot.    Getting your period while competing is something that isn't talked about enough at all. Can you talk about the history that this sport has in your family? My parents run a taekwondo school in Winnipeg, which is where my whole family lives. My dad started taekwondo in Korea, which is where he was born. His family immigrated to Canada when he was eight years old and so they lived there and still live there today. In 1993, my dad, alongside my grandpa, opened up the doors to the Town Park Academy, which is our taekwondo school. And so my whole family grew up there. My mom started training there, and that's where she met my dad. They got married and started running the school together. So, yeah, there are 16 black belts in my family, and nine of us are women. It's super cool and very empowering to have strong female role models in my life who are black belts too. We all get to share this sport we love so much together.   It's super cool and very empowering to have strong female role models in my life who are black belts too. We all get to share this sport we love so much together. Your father is your coach and your brothers are also competing in taekwondo. Does having so many family members competing in the same sport complicate things? Or is it a source of comfort to have them there with you? It truly is incredible to be on this journey alongside my dad as our coach and my two younger brothers. But there are challenges as well. On the days when training is not going so well, or you have a bad competition, driving back home with your dad and your brothers, the car ride is not the best. And then when you get home, and you're still sitting across the table from each other, it's not the most fun. Aspects like that make it hard sometimes. And being a 24-year-old girl and spending this much time with your dad isn’t typical. But I'm so grateful for the time we spend together, what we've been able to achieve together, and what we're still striving to achieve. How does gender equality show up in taekwondo?  I think we're very fortunate in the sport of taekwondo because it is very equal, whether you're male or female. The prize money is the same. The opportunities are the same. The competitions are the same. A lot of times if you ask people, they’ll say the women are more exciting to watch than the men. I hope to be one of those women who are exciting to watch. How does it feel to be the first person in your family to go to the Olympics?  It's an honour. It's been a dream in my family for a really long time. My grandpa had a dream to go to the Olympics in cycling. Although nobody knows where that comes from because he didn't even cycle. My dad was a speedskater, but taekwondo has been in my family for at least four generations. I'm the first to go to the Olympics, but hopefully not the last. My brothers are coming up as well, and the goal is for all three of us to be there one day. To become an Olympic athlete requires a ton of work and dedication. Is there anything you’ve had to let go of in exchange for your pursuit of this dream? You know, I think as athletes, we all sacrificed so much to be able to compete at the top of our sport and hopefully step on top of the podium. There are times when you miss events or things with your family or friends. There are things you miss out on daily. But if you have a goal and a dream to achieve something great, there have to be sacrifices that come along with it. And if your dreams are that strong, then I think it'll be worth it in the end.    If you have a goal and a dream to achieve something great, there have to be sacrifices that come along with it. And if your dreams are that strong, then I think it'll be worth it in the end.  By: Carter Selinger

Whether as a basketball player, coach, mentor, or entrepreneur—Keesa Koomalsingh knows how to pivot. Actually, she describes pivoting as one of her greatest strengths on her path to removing barriers and providing unprecedented support to female athletes of all ages. Keesa is changing the landscape of women’s sport in Canada. Let’s get to know her.      Can you tell us a bit about HoopQueens?  HoopQueens is a nonprofit organization made for female basketball players. We’ve changed the narrative for women's basketball across the country by creating Canada’s first paid women’s basketball league. But it’s a lot more than that—HoopQueens is an ecosystem for women in sport. We’re creating a pipeline of support for athletes at the elementary, high school, post-secondary, and pro level.    We’ve changed the narrative for women's basketball across the country by creating Canada’s first paid women’s basketball league. Are there any moments you've experienced either as an athlete or entrepreneur that have felt especially significant—things you look back on as turning points? When I tore my ACL I didn't know who I was after. That injury changed my perspective on how to deal with life. I had to figure out a different path, and just pivot. Now I feel like pivoting is my biggest strength as an entrepreneur and the founder of HoopQueens.   When I tore my ACL I didn't know who I was after. That injury changed my perspective on how to deal with life, figure out a different path, and just pivot. Why do you think it's important for women and girls to stay in sports? I think it’s important for us to just keep doing what we're excited about. Sports teach you many  transferable life skills that can be applied to so many different areas of life. When people embody that  sisterhood and concept of being on a team, great things happen; you meet so many new people and canform incredible, lifelong friendships. Do you have any advice for young girls in sport or just women in general? Believe in yourself, have confidence, and don't be so hard on yourself. We can be so hard on ourselves and so critical of how we look, how we think,  and how we act. Sometimes we don't give ourselves enough praise, especially with all of the barriers we face in society. So, my advice is to simply be positive.  Are there any things you say to yourself when you need a confidence boost or when you’re having a challenging time? What I say to myself now is, “You’re unstoppable. You can do it. You started Canada's first paid women's basketball league. You can do anything you put your mind to.” I just like to remind myself of the skills I have. What led you to create HoopQueens?  When I came back for the summers as a university athlete there was no place for womento play basketball. I had to jump in with the guys, and I was often the only girl. As well, growing up, I only had male coaches  and mentors. They were amazing and a big part  of my success today, but I didn't have that older sister figure in the basketball community to look up to and ask questions. I wanted to be that for the next generation, and to create an ecosystem of support for women's basketball.  Have you noticed a shift in the sport of basketball and the players that you deal with in Toronto since you started the league?  We’re heading into our third season this year, and there’s definitely been a big shift. If athletes don't have an option to play overseas when they graduate, they really look forward to playing in  our summer league. That means the most to me because it just didn’t exist when I was playing. A lot of  these players haven’t gotten to play in front of family and friends in a long time. So that’s really cool too.   Sometimes I just can't believe that I started this organization that means so much to the community.  What role do you think community plays in the success of female athletes Community is everything for female athletes. It's the cheer in the stands, the comforting words after a tough game, and the shared victories that make every win sweeter. In the rollercoaster of highs and lows, having a community means you're never alone. It's the teammates who become sisters and the fans who become family. We fall in and out of love with the game, so our support systems play such an important role in the success and trajectory of our careers. The theme for International Women's Day this year is “Inspire inclusion”. Can you share a little bit about what this idea means for the work you're doing in your community? Inclusion is about making sure we all have opportunities regardless of our many differences . Our junior HoopQueens program is one of my favourite things. It’s a skills and development program for young girls ages 5 to 14. And it’s also cost-free because when I was an athlete that was always an issue with not being able to  get to every practice or a game, or couldn't afford shoes, or uniforms and things like that. We get gas cards for parents and partner with Footlocker and Nike so we can provide shoes if need be. We do all that so kids can just step on the court, play, and have fun. We don’t want kids worrying about barriers.   We focus on the introductory skills of basketball, but that's only about 10% of it. Basketball is what I use  to get everyone in the room. I want to teach young girls about life, relationships, education, and how  to balance all those things. I just want to show young girls how to succeed on and off the court and teach  them to have the confidence to be the queens that they are.  With young women and basketball these days, it can often feel very transactional. It’s all about winning or getting a scholarship. I want it to be about sisterhood, having fun, and the life skills that basketball teaches you. My main thing is just trying to be the change I wanted to see growing up.    I just want to show young girls how to succeed on and off the court and teach them to have the confidence to be the queens that they are. How have your personal experiences influenced the way you teach? When I was in university, I went through a really bad relationship. It shifted my personal experience and my confidence. When I started HoopQueens I really wanted to build support for young girls that are in university, and high school because that's when those relationships typically start. That’s what started the mentorship side of our program. I want to let these girls know about setting boundaries, building healthy relationships in your life, and discovering what a healthy relationship looks like.  When we spoke earlier, you talked about the importance of recognizing intersectionality. Can you tell us more about that?  As Black women, we're in the trenches and we don't want to fight anymore. We don't want to be seen as  tough women anymore. We want to be able to walk into a room and feel respected without having to  say what we do and what we've done. Sometimes I feel I have to prove myself for people to respect me in a conversation. This is why it’s important to talk about intersectionality and how every woman can play a role in lifting each other up. A lot of Black women feel like, to be in certain rooms, we have to code  switch, or we can't be ourselves because we're not welcome in the space. There’s a lot of imposter  syndrome that comes with that.    As Black women…we want to be able to walk into a room and feel respected without having to say what we do and what we've done. Is there something you would say to people experiencing that kind of imposter syndrome?  If you don't feel like you belong somewhere, then create your own space. That's what I did. Just create your own room and let people gravitate towards you.  By: Carter Selinger

Raia—or “Coach Carey”—is a three-time-certified life coach, motivational speaker, and co-founder of Get Real, a charity that provides antiblack racism workshops, anti-bullying workshops, and LGBTQIA+ awareness workshops to schools, camps, and businesses. By openly sharing how she has overcome personal hardships, she creates a welcoming and safe environment for people to shift their mindset towards self-awareness, resilience, acceptance and sustainable success.  Why do you feel like your work is important? It doesn't matter who you are, where you're from, what you look like, or how you identify—everyone is going to have ups and downs, and it's important for us to be able to be proactive about those ups and downs in life. Everyone can work on building their confidence from within.   "It doesn't matter who you are, where you're from, what you look like, or how you identify—everyone is going to have ups and downs..." What’s something you wish someone talked to you more about when you were younger? Mental health issues, body image issues, and how to build confidence. I've dedicated my work to helping people move through the same issues I’ve struggled with so they can build the confidence to go through life. We all need that. I wish I’d learned how to speak to myself, and about myself, because that plays a big role in how you show up in the world.  Growing up, I really never heard anyone talking about body image. For someone like me, who's masculine representing and identifies a little bit differently than just male or female, it would’ve been really helpful to learn that I'm not alone. It's beautiful to see that now there are those resources for young people.   But I think that would have really helped me to hear more people talking about the realm of mental health. When I was younger, I faced a lot of bullying. I hated school. I cried. I never wanted to be there. I think if I would have learned a bit more about how to regulate my emotions at that age, it would have helped a lot.  How did you get started doing this? I started with really wanting to understand myself and others, which is why I majored in psychology. Psychology was a great way for me to gain insight on why people do the things they do. But I never saw myself represented in that field, whether it was case studies, or the work we were studying. So I thought, “How can I support myself and my communities if I don't see myself represented here?”  Given my background in psychology, life coaching seemed like a great fit. So, I went back to school for coaching when I was 27, and I really felt like I had to get back to the drawing board. I thought, “How can I support myself and support others?” Now I have three certifications in coaching, and I honestly can say that I love what I do so much. "I wish I’d learned how to speak to myself, and about myself, because that plays a big role in how you show up in the world."  Can you share one of the hardest things to overcome in your work? I love that people are getting more support, but what I find difficult in my space of life coaching is that there are a lot of people calling themselves life coaches that aren't certified, and that could be potentially harmful to someone who's looking to hire someone.  How are taboo topics about women's bodies, women's health, pregnancy and postpartum sex holding women back?  The two things that really get me fired up that I wish we talked about more are women's reproductive health and mental health. We need to be talking about these things.   I recently was in the hospital with a lot of cramps and pain. I had no idea what was going on. I wish these types of things were talked about more because then I could’ve been more proactive and preventative. The doctor thought I had a cyst on my ovaries. It turned out to be my fibroids. Luckily, I’m fine. I just wish that this was discussed or talked about more when I was younger.   "The two things that really get me fired up that I wish we talked about more are women's reproductive health and mental health. We need to be talking about these things."  What do we all stand to gain by connecting women to their power and inner strength?  When more women-identifying people have access to education and resources, I think the whole world stands to benefit. Historically, women-identifying people often put resources, money, and support back into the community, and back into young people. That’s how we continue to learn, grow, and share together. And I think our world could stand to use more women-identifying people in power, leadership, and support. When they have those resources and education, women-identifying people build their inner strength, their confidence, their morale, and it helps how they show up as leaders, partners, friends, and mothers.   What do you hope people walk away with after working with you?  The most rewarding part of my work is when my clients no longer need me and have the tools to truly do things on their own. I also love it when my clients have those “Aha” moments. Sometimes just a reframe, a shift in language, or a new perspective can have such a big impact on how someone feels about themselves. That gets me fired up.  Writing: Carter Selinger

Shaughnessy Otsuji is a cosmetic and restorative tattoo artist. She’s the owner of Studio Sushiko, which has locations in Langley, BC, and Los Angeles, California. Her passion lies in restoring confidence, taking an inclusionary approach to her work. She helps people reclaim aspects of their physical appearance while collaborating with them to realize their truest inner beauty. Why do you feel like your work is important?  It's transformative, it's restorative. It brings confidence to every single person that I tattoo. It's restoring a feature that a person has lost. It's really impactful.   "The emotional aspect of my work can be difficult. I think a lot of people get into this career because it's rewarding. And it is. It's amazing to be able to offer this to people, but not everyone realizes how heavy it can be..."   How did you get started doing this? I’ve been a cosmetic tattoo artist for over a decade. I started off brow tattooing, and got a lot of clients who were going through chemotherapy and losing their brow hair. I have an aunt who had a double mastectomy, and she was my inspiration for getting into nipple tattooing. She had a preventative double mastectomy, and she was the one who told me that I should start offering nipple tattoos. The more I learned about what she had gone through, the more I became convinced that this was an amazing thing that needed to be offered. So she kind of pushed me in that direction. Now, I finally get to tattoo her in, like, two weeks. I'm so excited! Can you share one of the hardest things to overcome in your work?  The emotional aspect of my work can be difficult. I think a lot of people get into this career because it's rewarding. And it is. It's amazing to be able to offer this to people, but not everyone realizes how heavy it can be going into these appointments and hearing everyone's story. I've definitely learned a ton about different types of surgeries and different scarring and mastectomies, and radiation. You have to take that on. As amazing as everyone’s story is, it's heavy. Half the time I don't even realize it until the end and I'm like, wow, I just learned so much about this person.  How are taboo topics about women's bodies, women's health, pregnancy and postpartum sex holding women back?  Social media still censors a lot of the work I do. I’ll spend a good two to three hours sometimes editing a video. I’ll make sure the transitions are perfect and everything lines up with the music. Then, I’ll finally post it, and within like 20 minutes it'll get flagged and deleted. That’s frustrating. I get a community guidelines violation, and it gets removed for “nudity” or “sexual activity.” It's really frustrating because I want to show people what's available for them. But Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook will delete my posts right away. I guess I'm flattered that it looks realistic and people are falling for it, but it should be allowed. It's a tattoo of a nipple. It's not even a real nipple, but what's the big deal with nipples anyway? Everyone has them.  "It's a tattoo of a nipple. It's not even a real nipple, but what's the big deal with nipples anyways? Everyone has them.”  But as far as reconstruction goes, and as far as tattooing goes, I do have a lot of clients who go through the process and don't know what's available to them. It's great when they end up doing their research and find me and find out that there is a natural-looking option. Sometimes people will bring me a photo of what they used to look like for reference, but oftentimes they have a blank canvas so they can choose their ideal nipple type, which might even be a heart shape, which is really fun. And I like to add as many details as possible. Strategic shadows and highlights, little bumps and wrinkles—all those little details that may be perceived as flaws end up making it look so much more natural and realistic. What do we all stand to gain by connecting women to their power and inner strength?  I feel like when women come together in a community, they're able to share so much knowledge between each other and go through things together. That’s so helpful when you're dealing with something as intense as breast cancer and reconstruction.  "I feel like when women come together in a community, they're able to share so much knowledge between each other and go through things together."  What do you hope people walk away with after working with you?  I hope that my clients walk away with the most confidence that they've ever had, and oftentimes I see it in their face, which is amazing. Once they leave my studio, it's like a weight is lifted off their shoulders. They can look in the mirror and not see scars anymore. They don't see this memory of cancer anymore. They just see what they used to look like.   Writing: Carter Selinger

Nikki is the Creator of The Belle Method and The Bump Method Inc. She fuses Pilates with Pelvic Health, supporting everyone in feeling confident and strong throughout pregnancy, birth, postpartum and beyond. Why do you feel your work is important? Women's health has been largely neglected in many spheres, and now we're kind of behind in terms of research and how we treat women throughout pregnancy and postpartum. The more we educate women, the more they can advocate for what makes the most sense for them.  After giving birth, so many issues are explained away as just being “part of motherhood.” Women think, “I'll just suck it up.” And, unfortunately, when women have issues with incontinence, pain, or their pelvic floor there aren’t many people saying, “Yeah, this is common, but you don't have to live with it.” I'm very passionate about spreading the word because I think women internalize a lot of shame about issues with fertility, miscarriages, and complications with pregnancy when so often they’ve done nothing wrong. How did you get started doing this? I was a dancer. I injured my knee, found pilates, rehabbed it, and it was life changing. After that, I started working out of a physiotherapy clinic. In my mid-twenties, I felt I had no business teaching pilates to firefighters with herniated discs, and 65-year-olds with osteoporosis, and a teen with scoliosis and a rod in her back. But those were my clients. And so, I studied hard before each session and asked the physios, chiropractors, and massage therapists what I could do with each person. I learned so much from them early on.  Then, I started to make group classes. I was really able to fuse my dance background with my injuries and special populations background, which helped me create a class that would be a fun, energizing, accessible workout. I started getting a lot more pregnant women coming, and I thought: “Ooh, you guys need your own thing.” So, I started classes for pregnancy and postpartum.   "I think if we really focus on empathy, community, and support, there's nothing we can't accomplish."  What’s something you wish someone talked to you more about when you were younger?Pelvic health. When I was starting out, 70% of women in my postpartum class were joking about having bladder problems. I had no kids then. I was still in my twenties and I thought, “I need to learn more about this. I don't think this is the way it's supposed to be.” Then, after having my own kids in my thirties, my interest in pelvic health sort of just grew and grew. So, I'm not going to stop talking about it. I also really believe in community over competition. And I think that’s something we really need to teach our young girls about. There's this societal myth that women are catty and cruel to each other, and I really have found the opposite to be true. I think if we really focus on empathy, community, and support, there's nothing we can't accomplish. Can you share one of the hardest things to overcome in your work? I spend a lot of time convincing my students that it's never too late to improve their pelvic health. A lot of people think that peeing their pants, or having symptoms of heaviness, or having bad diastasis means it's over for them. But I have students in their 60s who are improving their quality of life, improving their pelvic health, and just feeling better in their own bodies.   After pregnancy there's a lot of trying to slim down, lose weight, and take up less space to fit a certain aesthetic. I like to come from a place of function. Let’s just work to help our bodies function well. Let’s come from a place of gratitude, especially if you've carried a pregnancy, for everything our bodies have been through and helped us through.   "Let’s come from a place of gratitude, especially if you've carried a pregnancy, for everything our bodies have been through and helped us through."  How are taboo topics about women's bodies, women's health, pregnancy and postpartum sex holding women back?Let's talk about postpartum sex. We are often cleared at six weeks to say we can resume all normal activities, including penetrative intercourse, and some women internalize that as pressure. It’s like “You’ve got to go do this.” And we're not really given any guidance. We're told the advice: “Just use some lube, be on top, have some wine,” and it's like a joke. But a lot of women experience pain, and then they think there's something wrong with them. But they haven't really gotten help. They haven't seen a physiotherapist, or learned about their pelvic floor. This can create a neurological feedback loop where your brain starts to anticipate pain. You can get issues with vaginismus. Or issues with chronic pain during sex. And this is terrible because, again, there's shame. Sometimes your closest girlfriends won’t even talk about this.   Let's talk about the lack of aftercare that women get after major abdominal surgery, like cesarean birth. When you have a cesarean birth they cut through seven layers of tissue. It's a major abdominal surgery, and then they’re like, “You're good. Go for a walk and go home. Take some Advil.” I've had heart surgery myself—it was a catheter ablation, which is a day surgery. It was nothing compared to birth, and yet I got more after care than I did with birth.  "Let's talk about postpartum sex. We're told the advice of just use some lube, be on top, have some wine, and it's like a joke."  What do we all stand to gain by connecting women to their power and inner strength?I honestly believe that women can change the world. Period. Self love can be challenging, especially if you look at your body and you don't recognize yourself, which is unfortunately common. I hope that we can come to this place of gratitude for everything we've been through and then trust that it's never too late to develop the belief that our bodies are stronger than we think. If we can work from a place of self love, I think we can make a lot of headway.   What do you hope people walk away with after working with you? Birth can either be one of the most empowering or traumatizing experiences of your life. And how we are treated, how we are respected, validated, spoken to—everything makes such a huge difference. I get a lot of women in our classes who have had prior traumatic experiences. And it's the most amazing feeling when I hear of a positive birth after that trauma. When I hear women saying things like: “I was able to do it my way” or  “I'm not peeing my pants anymore” or “I didn't tear this time and I feel like a million dollars” or  “You've given me a feeling of confidence about my body that I thought I had lost”—I get shivers every time.  Writing: Carter Selinger